


The Top of His Lists

by EmeraldWaves



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Humor, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, in which i try to be sexy AND funny LOl, just writing rando stuff, prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-24
Updated: 2018-04-24
Packaged: 2019-04-27 10:57:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14423955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmeraldWaves/pseuds/EmeraldWaves
Summary: "Do you hate me, Iwa-chan?"Iwaizumi Hajime has a list. A few actually. And somehow, Oikawa Tooru is at the top of all of them.





	The Top of His Lists

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a fun lil pwp fic I wrote while playing a prompt game with some friends! The prompt was “I wish I could hate you." Enjoy!

Iwaizumi Hajime has a list.

It's long. If he wrote it out, he could hold it above his head and it would reach to the floor. A list miles long of grievances about one person and one person alone; Oikawa Tooru.

Alas, the list isn't physical, only a figment of Iwaizumi's imagination, but he thinks about it a lot. Especially during times like this, when Oikawa is being a _teasing little shit._

He's adjusted his shorts at least twelve times. Maybe more. Iwaizumi's lost count. His fingers glide around the band fit snug around his waist, and Oikawa pops his hip out. Plus, he keeps bending down to fix the brace wrapped tightly around his knee. He snaps the material against his skin, and Iwaizumi tries his very best not to look at the curve of his taut ass. Their shorts are loose, but Iwaizumi knows _exactly_ what's underneath them and it makes his imagination run wild.

The worst part is the way Oikawa _looks_ at him. He turns his head around, his brown eyes narrow, his smile coy and knowing. Iwaizumi can hear his voice echoing through his mind.

_"Were you checking out my ass, Iwa-chan~"_

He mentally adds 'Oikawa's ass' to the list of things he hates. Too distracting, too curvy, and the worst part is, he _knows_ it. Iwaizumi can see it on his face, can tell from how often Oikawa bends over in his direction.

Cocky shit. He's way too impressed with himself. That's definitely one of the complaints on Iwaizumi's list. Unfortunately, he's been like that for as long as Iwaizumi can remember.

Huffing out, Iwaizumi returns to his personal exercises, trying everything to ignore Oikawa's shitty teasing. He knows why he's doing it too.

Oikawa stretches his leg out, pushing his ass out, rolling his heel back to stretch out his leg, and Iwaizumi wants to go for a run or-

"Iwaizumi-san, are you okay?" Matsukawa asks, tilting his head to look at him. Iwaizumi blinks, confused by someone breaking his train of thought.

"Eh?" Iwaizumi jerks his gaze to Matsukawa, better him than Oikawa's ass.

"You were staring off in the distance and your brow was furrowed a lot more than normal," he shrugs casually.

"Oh... yeah m'fine," he mumbles.

"Iwa-chan~!" Oikawa calls out and practically tackles him, his arm slinging over his shoulder. "Do you wanna practice your spikes?" he asks, his mouth far too close to Iwaizumi's ear. His breath tickles at his skin and Iwaizumi feels a shiver run down his spine.

The way Oikawa _affects_ his stupid body; Top 10 Anime Betrayals right there, Iwaizumi swears. That's definitely on the list.

"Not with you," he grunts finally, pushing his face to shove his body off him. The faster he can get Oikawa away from him, the quicker he can get his heart rate to calm down.

The way his heart feels makes the list too. How quickly it speeds up whenever Oikawa touches him in any way should be illegal.

Oikawa pouts, his lip curling out. Iwaizumi wants to punch his stupid face.

"What? But I was stretching and getting ready, just for you," he whines. Damn right he was. But he sure as hell wasn't doing that to help him practice his damn spikes.

"Sure you were," Iwaizumi growls, and storms off the court. He doesn't have time for Oikawa's bullshit today. Practice is over, and he's not in the mood to stay late.

"Something is sure eating him," Matsukawa hums, and Iwaizumi barely hears him as he walks away. He does not want to hear Oikawa's response. He's not sure what's bothering him so much besides Oikawa Tooru's general existence, but he figures it probably has something to do with the circumstance from the night before.

Oh god. He freezes in the middle of the court. He's thought about it again, and his face turns bright red. Idiot. Idiot Oikawa.

He's probably going to follow him to the showers. Most of the time if Oikawa stays late, Iwaizumi stays late with him, which is usually everyday. Oikawa is nothing if not determined. He always has to be the best, perfect. (Admittedly Iwaizumi has a smaller list, one of things he absolutely adores about Oikawa Tooru. His perseverance is sitting very high atop that one.)

And even if Iwaizumi doesn't stay, usually Oikawa will stay on the court until he's not allowed to be there. However, if he senses something is off, Oikawa will follow himi.

How well Oikawa Tooru knows him is, quite frankly, a bother, when he wants to be left alone. Right now, that trait is slowly climbing the ranks because quite frankly, Iwaizumi wants to go home and forget about last night and forget about Oikawa's teasing.

But of course, he finds Oikawa at the front gate of the school. He's looking down at his phone, his bag slung over his shoulder. He looks comfortable in his sweat suit, and again, Iwaizumi's mind runs wild, knowing just how muscular his body is under those pants.

He turns away from his phone, his brown hair brushing across his forehead. He smiles when he sees Iwaizumi, his brown eyes twinkling against the setting sun. How pretty Oikawa is is also on Iwaizumi's list, but sometimes it jumps between lists. Sometimes Iwaizumi loves his face, flushed red, in pleasure, and sometimes he wants to punch it when he's being a _teasing little shit_ , like he was today.

"Iwa-chan~" he calls out and Iwaizumi has half a mind to just walk right by him, but they _have_ to walk in the same direction so that's totally useless. "Were you going to walk home without me?" he asks.

"Yup."

A dramatic look crosses his face, and Iwaizumi could really do without Oikawa's antics.

"But we always walk home together. And," he hums, "my parents are going out to dinner tonight. You could come over."

"No thanks," Iwaizumi scoffs, walking through the school gate as he turns down the street.

"Are you still upset about last night?" he asks, his voice softer.

Iwaizumi freezes, and turns to glare at his so-called 'best friend'. "We decided we wouldn't talk about it, and all you've done today is this shitty teasing shit to _remind_ me!"

"Because," Oikawa sighs, rolling his neck back. "I already told you it wasn't a big deal Iwa-chan! And I was trying to be sexy for you! Like normal!" he smirks.

Iwaizumi rolls his eyes. This fuckeroni. "Yeah, but today you were so damn... _extra_!"

"Well excuse me for trying to boost your confidence!" Oikawa scoffs, and folds his arms indignantly.

"How is _you_ being sexy supposed to boost _my_ confidence, Shittykawa?!" he growls, glaring at him.

"Because it shows I still want you, despite-"

Chucking the ball in his hand at Oikawa's face, Iwaizumi storms down the street.

"No! Iwa-chan!" he calls out, chasing after him, but Iwaizumi keeps moving, not wanting to look back at his stupid face. His face is 100% on the list now. At the fucking top.

Oikawa is rushing through random apologies and excuses, but Iwaizumi's not listening. The asshole grabs his hand when they stop outside Oikawa's house. "Please, Hajime," he says softly, and Iwaizumi feels his cheeks heat up. Using his first name is just so damn unfair.

"What?" he snaps, looking at him.

"Come inside."

He's so weak to him, so of course he ends up in Oikawa's house, slipping his shoes off in the doorway. It's so quiet, no sound. Normally his father is flitting about in the kitchen, or his mother will have music on in the main room, but right now the house is dark and silent.

Normally... this is the perfect setting for alone time with his shitty boyfriend...

Oikawa turns around and drops his bag to the ground with a sigh. "I just want you to stop thinking about it," he admits. "It's really not a big deal, Iwa-chan... What, are we never going to have sex again?"

Iwaizumi raises his eyebrows.

"Ideally yes." It would save him the embarrassment.

"Iwa-channnnn~" Oikawa whines and squeezes his hands hard, resting his forehead on his shoulder. "I'd die," he breathes softly, and _that_ goes right to Iwaizumi's groin.

The thing is...

God, it's stupid. _So_ damn stupid.

"Fuck..." Iwaizumi groans, and pulls back, running his hands down his face.

The thing is... last night, while they were having sex, Iwaizumi lost his boner, and it was the most embarrassing thing to happen to him since he tripped during third grade recess, fell in a puddle, and looked like he'd peed his pants for the rest of the day.

And it's not like they haven't had sex plenty of times! They have, and it's always been fine. Except last night. For some strange reason, Oikawa had moved, rolling his hips up directly towards Iwaizumi at a weird angle, and while being inside of Oikawa, the boy he loved so damn much, he'd gone completely soft, unable to get hard again for the rest of the night.

It was shameful, a total embarrassment.

Really if he's being honest, his own dick is at the top of his shit list, and it has nothing to do with Oikawa Tooru.

He wants to do it again, he really does, but he keeps replaying last night in his head. The look of confusion on Oikawa's face when he pulled out, the way he desperately tried everything to get Iwaizumi hard again. At that point he'd been too ashamed, too awkward, there was no way...

But now...

Oikawa's been teasing him all day, and maybe Iwaizumi finally understands why. Oikawa just wants to prove he can work Iwaizumi up, and admittedly, it has worked.

"I know you're nervous," Oikawa whispers, wrapping his arms around his waist, pressing his nose against his neck. "And it's making you all angry. But I think someone is just horny," Oikawa teases, running his fingers over the elastic of Iwaizumi's pants. It starts off as a nice gesture, and dissolves into Oikawa's typical shitty personality.

"Yeah, _you're_ horny," Iwaizumi retorts.

"Well... yes," he whispers, slipping his hands down the back of Iwaizumi's pants, groping at his ass. "I've been thinking about getting to be alone with you all day," he whines.

Groaning, Iwaizumi places his hands on Oikawa's hips, pushing him back against the wall. "Really? I couldn't freaking tell from all the times you were bending over _at_ practice," he hisses.

"Oh!" he winks, his tongue swiping across his lip, playfully. Iwaizumi's hands tremble against his hips. "So you did notice!"

"Of course I noticed, dipshit! The whole _team_ noticed!" he growls and pulls bank. "C'mon," he says, and grabs Oikawa's wrist, dragging him upstairs. As much as he'd love to just take him against the wall, the last thing he wants to do is leave any evidence around Oikawa's house.

"I knew you wanted to," he giggles, following behind him with zero resistance. Why is it he always caves to Oikawa Tooru?

He pushes him down on the bed, pressing his hands to Oikawa's shoulders, his jacket splayed open. "You're an idiot, you know that?"

"Am I?" he asks, his brown eyes glisten with lust. He really has been waiting all day for this. Oikawa's leg comes up to brush against Iwaizumi's crotch, and he shivers. He's been fighting the emotions for awhile, trying to ignore the way Oikawa was teasing him, but now they're alone and it seems useless to fight the urges. "I'd say I'm a genius, for getting your mojo back."

This. Shitlord.

Growling, Iwaizumi slams their lips together. "Shut up," he groans, nipping at his jaw.

"Do you hate me, Iwa-chan?" Oikawa purrs, and he especially hates the gentle lilt of his voice. His voice, that's definitely made the list a few times.

"Yup," he sighs, his hot breath trickling over Oikawa's skin. He traces his fingers down his jaw, pressing his lips to his neck.

"No-...you don't~" There's a slight hitch of his breath, and Iwaizumi smirks, a huff of proud air slipping from his nose.

"You're right. I wish I could hate you. So fucking much."

"But you can't, can you, Hajime?" he pants, rolling his hips up towards Iwaizumi.

"Nope," he mumbles, reaching under his shirt to yank it over Oikawa's head. His fingers trail down Oikawa's toned chest, his fingertips gently gliding over every dip and curve of his muscles. Oikawa is perfect, unfairly so, but Iwaizumi keeps that opinion to himself, knowing it would explode Oikawa's ego far too much for his own good.

Oikawa chuckles, his fingers yanking Iwaizumi's shirt off as he tosses it to the floor. "Good. I'd be sad," he pouts.

"Can't have that," Iwaizumi mutters, kissing down his chest. His lips caress Oikawa's skin, loving the soft hums and little sighs that leave his mouth as he rolls his chest towards Iwaizumi's lips.

He moves lower and lower, tugging Oikawa's pants off. He loves seeing his boyfriend completely naked, and so beautiful in front of him. He hates how right Oikawa was, perhaps he just needed a little encouragement, because he feels tight, his cock hard, pressing against his briefs.

He reaches into the drawer where they hide their lube, squirting it on his fingers as he presses two inside of Oikawa. He whimpers, his brown hair pushing back against the pillow. "Hgn... Hajime..." he groans. "I just want you..." His voice is breathy, begging for what he's desired all day apparently, and Iwaizumi is happy to oblige, at least he is this time.

Oikawa is often hard to resist once they get this far. His hair pressed against his sweaty forehead, his body rolling towards Iwaizumi, and his voice breathy and needy. There's something about seeing his beautiful face, cheeks red, mouth hanging open, that drives Iwaizumi right to the edge. This image sits pretty at the top of his favorite things about Oikawa Tooru list.

He yanks his own pants off, his cock achingly hard. Perfect. He thrusts his fingers deep inside of Oikawa, stretching him, his hole squeezing him tightly. He wants to feel him completely and move their hips together. "Hajime, _please_ ," Oikawa whispers, and Iwaizumi is lost.

Pressing his tip to Oikawa's entrance, he slowly rocks his hips inside, pushing himself in fully. Oikawa's knees come up to his chest, his hips rotating back so Iwaizumi can penetrate him deeply, his tip brushing against his prostate directly at this angle. "A-Ah... H-Hajime..." he groans, pressing his hands against Iwaizumi’s back, his nails scratching down. The feeling burns at the muscles on Iwaizumi's back, but he loves it.

"Tooru, you're so tight..." he pants, kissing at his jaw. He loves hearing the soft moans and pants which trickle out of Oikawa's lips, drool slipping from the sides of his mouth.

"Hajime...faster," he begs, and Iwaizumi smirks, wanting to bring Oikawa to an edge he knows Oikawa can't stand. He rolls his hips slowly at first, rocking like the motion of a wave, the muscles in his back rippling against Oikawa's nails, his ass squeezing as he pushes deep inside. He's going purposefully slow, fucking him deep. "Hajimeeeee," he whimpers. "You're teasing me," he pants.

"This is your punishment, for earlier," he chuckles, and Oikawa's pout is the cutest thing, Iwaizumi can't help but kiss it off his face.

But he can't keep the pace, his own cock throbbing in Oikawa's tight ass. Oikawa's humping up towards him, his hips twitching and Iwaizumi feels so sensitive he can barely hold himself back any longer.

Pressing his feet against his bed he slaps their hips together, slamming down into him. "O-Oh...Oh...Ngh...Hajime... perfect... yes," he groans, moaning deep. Oikawa's a loud love-maker, it's why they often wait for their parents to not be home to do things like this, so he can release his noises of pleasure freely.

"Damn... T-Tooru..." he grunts, the pace too much. "Cum for me," he says, wrapping his hand around Oikawa's leaking cock, stroking it fast. He sees the way Oikawa swallows, his stomach rolling forward; he's so damn close. They both are.

"H-Hajime!" Oikawa yells, and he's the first to finish, his cock shooting his cum all over his chest and Iwaizumi's stroking hand. His body twitches and his ass clenches around Iwaizumi's cock, and he tosses his head back.

"S-Shit... Tooru!" he grunts, throwing his head back as he buries himself inside of Oikawa completely. His finish pours into Oikawa's ass, and he sighs, slowly lowering himself to kiss him. His arms are shaking as he presses their lips together.

"I love you, Hajime," he whispers.

He pulls himself out, his body trembling from the pleasure. He drapes his arm around Oikawa's waist, rolling to the side to kiss his shoulder. "Love you too, Tooru..." he mumbles. It's still embarrassing to admit after all this time. Saying 'I love you' out loud will always be on his shit list.

"See," Oikawa chuckles, nipping at his lower lip. "I knew you'd be fine. It's me after all, how could you resist, Iwa-chan?" He sighs, running his fingers over Iwaizumi's arm.

"I'm gonna kill you."

Oikawa winks and sticks his tongue out, and once again, he's at the top of all of Iwaizumi's mental lists.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading this ridic fic LOLOL hopefully some people enjoy it LOL thanks to Adriana and Janie for playing this game with me and reading this over! It was super super fun to write this! Thanks for reading! 
> 
> [emeraldwaves](http://emeraldwaves.tumblr.com/) is my tumblr where I take requests  
> [musickazoo](https://twitter.com/musickazoo) is my twitter if you wanna yell about animu with me


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